This is the fifth on my series of articles which draw upon the book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”. You can read my previous articles about Habit 1 and Habit 2.
Habit Number 3: Put First Things First
“The successful person has the habit of doing the things that failures don’t like to do”. EM Gray from The Common Denominator of Success
Follow the Leader: Being a Good Self-Manager
What is one thing that you could do that, if you did do on a regular basis, would make a tremendous positive difference to your life?
Stephen Covey, author of 7-Habits of Highly Effective People begins the Habit-3 chapter with this question. Orienting us toward thinking about the day-to-day, moment-to-moment things that make up our lives. Many people think of the big dramatic decisions as having biggest life impact. But the incremental effect of small decisions tends to have a much greater influence.
Putting first things first means discipline, and as Covey reminds us, discipline derives from the noun disciple. To be a disciple means being a follower. Being a follower to a personal vision, to principles, to an overriding purpose or goal. Incrementally following a plan: this is how great things are achieved.
Habit number 2 says: Begin with the end in mind. Discovering a mission and then directing ourselves towards the “end in mind” means being a guru, a leader, a figurehead to be followed. If your “end in mind” is strong or attractive enough, you will be a powerful leader.
Habit number 3 says: Put first things first. This means effectively and efficiently being a disciple, a follower, a manager, an acolyte. Sometimes, perhaps usually, these first things are difficult, boring, confusing, or anxiety-provoking. But with strong enough leadership, the effective disciple breaks through these emotional barriers.
So being a good manager (Habit 3) highly depends on being a good leader (Habit 2). As Nietzsche said: “he who has a why to live can bear almost any how”.
Before embarking on Habit 3, it would be wise to ensure that you revisit Habit 2 and ensure that you are pointing towards the right endpoint.
Quadrant II
Look at the image below.
All tasks can be placed within this matrix. All tasks are either important or non-important. Important tasks are those that make a significant difference to our live. Important tasks are in line with our values and principles. Important tasks help us manifest our mission statements.
All tasks are either urgent or non-urgent. Urgent tasks are those that demand a response sooner rather than later. But just because something demands your attention it doesn’t make it important. Urgency just means that an action required soon, nothing more or less than that.
For people without a self-management system, urgency is the signal to action. Consider of the procrastinating student who starts an assignment the day before its due. The assignment is important. The assignment question was released months ago. But for the procrastinating student, the urge to action only occurred once the assignment became urgent.
Putting first things first means living in Quadrant 2 as much as possible.
Think about the initial exercise at the top of this page. What is one thing that, if done regularly, would make an enormous positive difference? This is almost certainly a Quadrant 2 action. Exercising more, working on relationships, studying or training tasks. Anything that you do for your future-self, and not your present-self is a Quadrant 2 task.
Consider the proactive student. As soon as the assignment is released, the proactive student starts its groundwork. As the due date approaches, the student edits and improves their work. The urgent period is taken up with fine tuning, not scrambling just to get it done.
Its clear that the proactive student will receive, on average, better grades than the procrastinator. But what is more profound still, is the proactive student’s ability to avoid crises. When two or more assignments are concurrently due, it is the proactive student who can weather the storm of the crisis and seek out opportunities for better grades.
Prioritising People
Living in Quadrant 2 essentially means being a good time manager. A good time manager is efficient: their tasks get done quickly. A good time manager has control: They decide how their time will be spent.
A flaw with seeing the world only through efficiency and control is what it does to our relationships with people. People can’t be treated like tasks. They can’t be treated according to efficiency. Rushing relationships ruins relationships.
Have you ever had a boss who tried rush a meeting with you when you were going through a personal crisis? Most people can think of times that they’ve been treated as a task to tick off the list. Most people dislike these interactions and resent being treated this way. With people, fast is slow and slow is fast.
When most people write down their priorities in life, the important relationships, spouse, children, friends are often at the top of the list. Our relationships are our first priorities. Putting first things first therefore also means honouring the importance of our important people.
When it comes to putting people first, we cannot be ruled by efficacy and control. We must be ruled by effectiveness. Effectiveness means taking the time to really be together with important people. In the workplace it means slowing down and treating colleagues, bosses and subordinates as humans. In private life, it means prioritising time with those relationships that are most important.
So, put first things first:
Do start with the difficult or boring tasks.
Do stay in Quadrant 2 as much as possible.
Do give as much time as is needed to important relationships.