One of the most common goals new clients have when attending treatment with me is to understand themselves or their symptoms. Mental health conditions can be scary. It can be reassuring to know that there is a name for the condition that you are experiencing. Conditions which are common are allocated research money for their cure/alleviation. This leads to the...[ read more ]
The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity – The Second Coming, William Butler Yeats Recently, several of my clients have described themselves as having the Imposter Syndrome. All of these people would be described as conventionally successful, in high status positions. Mostly, they are doing quite well in their jobs by objective measures such...[ read more ]
Imagine a dog, Puddles. Puddles is a pathetically eager-to-please dog. He has basic needs. Food, water, shelter, companionship. He has an owner who takes care of these needs. Now imagine Puddles’ owner changes the rules every day. For no reason, randomly, the owner changes the rules. Some days the owner allows Puddles inside, some days not. Some days Puddles is...[ read more ]
Nothing is more fascinating or more terrifying than one’s own personality. People will never tire of thinking about themselves and how they compare to others. Many of my clients arrive at the first session ready to tell me that they are an ENTJ or an Eagle or some other string of capital letters or bird species which apparently defines their...[ read more ]
Writing well before the age of clinical psychological research, the great Russian author Leo Tolstoy, opined that “happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way”. Perhaps Tolstoy was right about unhappy families, but it seems that he was wrong about unhappy couples. People whose relationships are headed for ruin are alike, they tend to use the same...[ read more ]
I recently met with some friends who have a three-year-old daughter. The mother was telling me about the precautions that she takes to teach her child about stranger danger, the risks of childhood sexual abuse. My intelligent and well-meaning friend felt torn. She wanted to give enough information so that her child would be watchful for predators, but not too...[ read more ]
Why does it always rain on me, was it because I lied when I was 17 – Travis “No matter what happens, things will never be simple for me. Nothing just goes easily”. Cory’s* department was recently privatised, and his role was reclassified. In effect, he had received a demotion due to not holding a university degree, despite being...[ read more ]
Happy New Year! I write this at the tail end of two weeks without working. As someone who has been (is?) addicted to work/goals/achievements, it can sometimes be hard to let myself slow down and just exist. Nevertheless, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my time off, and this relaxed state has inspired this article. Going Paleo Over past few months, several...[ read more ]
We’ve come to the end of another year – end of the decade. As I’ve mentioned before in this blog I’m a big believer in making goals at the end of the year. I’m a believer in using this time to reflect and take stock of the year that was. And in that spirit, this, the final blog of the...[ read more ]
Tammy* was estranged from her parents. “They can’t accept I’m an adult now”. With the support of her girlfriend she had completely cut them off. She now spent all her free time with her girlfriend and her girlfriend’s friends and family. “I need help with the anger I feel every time they try to contact me” she explained. Children need...[ read more ]
